Nearly every mom has been there, right?
“Oh, little Teneshia is one year old. When will she be joined by a little brother?”
“Little Trey and Simon are so cute! When will you be trying to give them a sister?”
“You’re pregnant with your fourth? Don’t you have enough?”
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Maybe these questions are innocent enough. Maybe people just need to butt out. But regardless of what you think about these types of questions, there does time a time where you simply have to ask yourself – when are you ready for another baby?
Do you even want another baby?
How do you know you’re ready?
Let’s face it. Do you ever really know?
When Andrew and I got married, we intended to have kids in 2-3 years. I was new to being a school administrator, and I wanted to stay in that position for at least two years – if not five.
Then our wedding night happened, and I got pregnant. Yes, on our wedding night. Don’t trust me? That’s fine. I know what happened, and that’s all that really matters. (Yes, we had multiple people ask how far along I was on the wedding. I could have gotten upset, but why bother? People are going to think and assume what they want.)
Were we “ready”? Nope. Nada. Not one little bit!
Then again, when are you ever really ready? When you have a certain amount of money in the bank? When you have a certain numbers of years and seniority in at your job? When you think you’re mature enough?
HA! No matter what “excuse” or reason you give, you’re never really “ready”.
But wait – we’re talking about baby #2. Well, I’m here to tell you that you’re even less “ready” with number two.
This time around you know a bit more about what to expect. Yes, many say that every pregnancy, labor, and delivery is different – but you aren’t going in blind anymore.
You not have a pretty good idea about how that morning sickness works. If you live in a snow stricken area, you know that a blizzard could cause you to not make it to the hospital on time – so you may consider what time of year to have your child. (Yes, it’s a legitimate concern!) You know a bit more about what to expect when pregnancy complications come around.
And what about the older sibling? Do you want them a certain age apart?
Perhaps you and your siblings are very close…then you may want your children placed similarly. On the contrary, if your siblings are fairly distant you may want to try something else.
So you ask around. You read blogs. You scour Pinterest for ideas. You ask family, friends, strangers in the supermarket who can’t get away because they are stuck in the checkout line. Ok, that last one might be a stretch…
But the truth is – you will never be truly ready for another baby. You can’t be any more prepared for baby #2, 3, 4, or more than you were for baby #1.
All the stars will not perfectly align. BUT – you know in your heart if the time is right. Plus – it’s really beyond your control anyway.
Even if you do get pregnant on your first try, it’s not just sheer luck or chance that took place.
God is there.
He will tell you when it’s time to have another baby, if you listen to Him.
So listen. You’ll never be ready, but He knows best.
Need a refresher on your prenatal class? You don’t have to go to the hospital for this one! Hillary from Pulling Curls is a OB nurse who has many amazing blog posts about labor and delivery. And now she has an entire course you can take while sitting on the comfort of your couch! Click here to check it out!
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